RTE make up story on slow news day

Raidió Teilifís Éireann have admitted to making up stories in order to fill up their website on this slow news day. Speaking to Eritas, RTE spokesperson Jacob Kinsella expressed regret for their actions. “We were really stuck and had nothing to write about. It’s not our fault nobody’s blowing themselves up or getting naked in public. We needed to entertain the people!”

RTE have posted a number of “fake” stories on their homepage, some of which have lead to mass confusion:

  • “Ireland disqualified from Euros because Thierry Henry said so.”
  • “Marty Morrissey comes out as transgender.”
  • “Game of Thrones 2 to be set in modern-day Tralee.”
  • “Gaelic football players to be paid in naggins due to weed shortage.”
  • “Brexit results say England fans will remain ‘shower of pricks’. “

“I genuinely thought Marty Morrissey was a transgender!” said Dubliner Aidan Lorcan. “To be honest, he’s an ugly bastard and I’m not quite sure what transgender means so I assumed that’s what he was.”

Another baffled RTE reader, Laura McCaul said “As an off-licence owner, I thought things were starting to look up for me now that the GAA would secretly pay lads in naggins… But no, they just got my hopes up. Back to eating cardboard for dinner.”

It is hoped that RTE will rectify their wrong-doings and apologise for their actions.

Bold.

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