A woman claiming to be the sister of the neighbour of the cousin of one of the bouncers working at Dublin’s Copper Face Jack’s has said that Donald J. Trump and Hillary Clinton shifted last night.
Speaking anonymously to Eritas, the woman said “Yeah, Kevin [the bouncer in question] swore he saw those two going at it like there was no tomorrow! There were people trying to take pictures of it, but their security guards were stopping them and only allowing duckface selfies or Snapchat filtered pictures” We were going to inquire if there was anything else going on, but we all know Donald’s a dog so there definitely was.
“Kev said he could’ve sworn he saw the pair leave together” said the woman, however we were unable to confirm this. “I’m sure it happened like, when you’re both running for President of the United States, there’s bound to be a build-up of sexual tension, d’ya know?”
It is unclear where the two were for pre-drinks.
We have reached out to Bill Clinton on the issue, but all we received was a copy of “I did not have sexual relations with that woman [probably referring to Hillary this time]”.
Political analysts believe that this might be a PR stunt by the Bernie Sanders’ Campaign to tarnish the reputations of the two, already dodgy candidates. Polls have been showing a steady decline in Sanders’ ability to pull, so it remains to be seen if this will have an affect on the race.